Assignment 13: Lena Ilagan A Proposition for a better Future

A rather pressing issue of importance has just recently come to my attention, and after extensive investigation, I have come to the conclusion that may shock you all.  As many of you have witnessed, this year has been a quite a doozy.  There remains only one party to blame, only one: millennials. This lecherous, sinful generation is the cancerous spawn of a once productive nation; if America is to remain a productive leader in an ever more competitive world, it would be in their leaders' best interest to do their very best to eradicate this selfie-taking scum.
I am well aware of the overwhelming majority of millennials reading my proposition, and though it is in many ways an attack on your group as a whole, let me at least take a bit of your time to argue my position.  Like most cancerous diseases, millennials were born out of unchosen predispositions, which were then triggered by an unhealthy lifestyle.  The predisposition came in the form of their preceding generation: the Baby Boomers.  Like Millennials, Baby Boomers led debaucherous lifestyles, many of whom dedicated their youth to smoking pot, protesting war, covering beautiful hardwood floors with disgusting linoleum, and other sinful endeavors. These Baby Boomers became the unhealthy predisposition to the Millennial cancer, allowing for them to grow such unhealthy lifestyles.  Their blasphemous activities gave rise to this narcissistic culture these Millennials live in today, and in order to atone for their mistakes, it should be up to those of the Baby Boomer generation to take on the main part of my proposition. In order to atone for their debauchery, Baby Boomers must be the main undertakers of the task of committing the mass genocide of eradicating all Millennials.
Now, though many doubt the plausibility of such a task, it should be noted that many Millennials are indeed already suicidal.  One of the most disgusting products of the generation are that of "memes," which depict aspects of millennial life in a humorous manner.  Though these memes are often lethal forms of cancer, when closely observed, they act as effective means of observation.  One of the most prevalent memes in Millennial culture circle around the topic of suicide; thus, when killing millennials, it should be noted that the generation already has a predisposition to death.  This factor will make the task much easier, and will also adhere the cancerous Millennial ideal of "consent."
Of course, this will still be no easy task; as many of the older generations say, Millennials expect things to be handed on a silver platter rather than do it themselves. Thus, in order to effectively administer the means of death, Baby Boomers will be required to hand out lethal syringes on a government approved platter. Millennials will thence be easily persuaded to kill themselves, as they are an independent generation, and like to do things themselves.