On November 23, 2016, outgoing president Barack Obama has, in an unprecedented attempt at last minute reform, declared the electoral college disband, and with it the results of the most recent election. During the question and answer press time after the initial announcement, when asked how he could circumvent the process of constitutional amendment to replace the country’s election system, Obama responded “what are you gonna do, kick me out?”
The white house has released an official FAQ document through its newsletter, cspan, and the new state news agency Breitbart, in the form of a graphic novelette depicting vice president Biden, dressed in captain America-esque attire, as the origin of the idea, envisioning it as “coming to him while he was talking with the prime minister.”
Many believe the underlying intentions of this act was to distract from the mishap that occurred this morning when the president was surprised to learn the turkey he pardoned was used to smuggle famous whistleblower Edward Snowden in from Russia the previous day. Snowden commented afterward “feels good to be home.” After which he strolled off muttering something about a ruined thanksgiving.
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